Still Not A Musician

by G. Gordon Gritty

  • Cassette + Digital Album

    A 32 track "shambling odyssey" AKA unlike anything you've heard, unless you've heard "I'm Not A Musician," in that case, get ready for another intimate embrace of GGG

    Includes unlimited streaming of Still Not A Musician via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 3 days
    edition of 50 

      $6 USD or more 


  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

      $5 USD  or more




Co-released on KLYAM Records and BUFU Records!

"Still Not A Musician is a 32-track retrospective covering the cream of the crop of this prolific rok shaman’s overflowing output from the past decade. There’s not a musical mind quite like his – care to take a peek inside and get ready for a bumpy ride." - Chris Collins


released May 29, 2015

All songs written, recorded, performed, and produced by G. Gordon Gritty in the computer room, 2005 to 2015 except for 'Life To Its Fullest' written by G Spin It and DJ Tom at Tom's House.

Layout: Jim Leonard



all rights reserved


G. Gordon Gritty Wakefield, Massachusetts

Rock N Roll
Non Musician

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Track Name: Caught Ya Misappropriating Assets
I can't believe I just caught you stealing paperclips from the supply room
I thought you knew better than to do such a thing, ya
Should have went to Staples and purchased them
Should have whipped out your card (and)
Could have
Added a better credit history to your records, to your CV, which nobody ever knows or is gonna look at
'Cause you claim to be a free lance artist doing your own thing
Making waffles on the side, doing pancakes
To be a player in the NFL draft. That's gonna take place.
Baby, it's going to take place in April. Yeah.
It's going to take place in New York Woo City
Shouldn't have caught you
Should stop stealing from the supply room
Track Name: Virtual Private Network
Your virtual private network is closed for the day. Better find an alternative set-up now. Gotta get your self back up. Gotta reconfigure your network, your private network. Would you wanna stay there, if you could connect with everybody. Why would you wanna stay there? There's a world out there waiting to hear from you. In your primary key. In your foreign key.
Track Name: Group Projects Bonkers
Yup, yup.
Did I tell you I hate group projects? They make me hurl, they make me nauseous.
When others speak, I go to Bonkers.

I get out my pocket change. I swipe my card and take the train.

I love reciting memory lines. To hear my voice. To clear my mind. To piss off others, to make them stress. To pee my pants, to shit your dress.

Bend over and pick up the watering can, you don't want the plants to die! Get on the roof, you don't want to leave.

I love reciting memory lines. To hear my voice. To clear my mind. To piss off others, to make them stress. To pee my pants, to shit your dress.

Aw shit!
Track Name: On The Park Bench
I was lazily sitting on the park bench. I didn't want to get up! People wanted to meet up with the girl at Veggie Galaxie. But I was on that bench. In my own world.

"Hey you gonna be all right? You gonna be ready for tomorrow?"

Man, I don't care. I'm just worrying about today.
Man, I don't care.

It could be a tornado outside. It could be December 21st. It could be anything at all. But I'm just on the park bench, dude. Hanging with Jay and Silent Bob. On the park bench, dude. On the bench, dude.
Track Name: The Land Is Arable and Fertile
It's the land, it's arable, it's fertile, it's the land. It's warm enough to grow veggies. It's cold enough to snow. It's warm enough to grow veggies. It's cold enough.

It's up in the atmosphere. See all you can see. Don't know what it will do. Don't got the 7 day forecast to see. No! Don't. Yup. Do!

Check it on your phone. Not if it's 90s style. Yeah. No!

Track Name: Achin' Like A Traveler
I been achin' like a motherfucker! You think that I'm a world traveler. But I've only been to three countries. I like Quebec. It was my favorite. I stood under the Falls, with the girl. With the girl. With Nabil, with Nabil. We went to the mall, and the wall.

I been faking like strawberry Smuckers, you think I'm a jelly head. But I've only tried three varieties. USA, Mexico, Canada, all for show! Once for school, twice for fun, it's what I done. It's what I've done. Do you wanna 60? Do you wanna sight see? Do you wanna pee pee? Do you wanna GG?
Track Name: Nothing Too Outlandish
The wounds are dark at night. I let the Histol fight. Fight or flight they say. Now, I never feel the same. 'Cause when you're looking at the mirror. 'Cause when you're looking to the sea. 'Cause when you're sitting on the chair. 'Cause when you play truth or dare.
Track Name: My Lonely Hen Gym
I made it to the library, I see a bunch of girls and guys. Fuck the guys, I only want the girls, they don't want me 'cause they don't know me. They don't ever wanna know me, I'm very interesting, I think. Some good bands. I like good bands. I got a website and a little extra cash. To spend on you and my next LP. But I gotta go pee pee, I will catch ya later. But I gotta go pee pee, we'll catch each other.

If you were an old person, would you buy a dog? If you were young, would you afford insurance? But if you could do anything like that. What would you do?
Track Name: The Kinda Guy Who Listens To Stories
Do I look like the type of dude who you tell stories to? Do I have that look in my face? Do I have that look of being there? Do I have an inviting eye?

Do I? Do I? I didn't think I did! Do I?

Doo doo. Doo woo. If I face that look knowledge. Is it like a microphone? Or a speaker system?

Do I?
Track Name: I'm Not A Musician
One two. One two seven five.

I'm not a musician. It's just what I do. I don't write music because I don't know how to do. I'm not a guitarist. Can't tune for shit. But when it matters, I can write a hit.

"i know what yall look like. and i am going to kick everyones ass on this next tour. dont be nice to my face because i will kill you. i have an extremely powerful attorney. i do whatever i want. i travel the world. i get laid by chicks hotter than you douches can dream of (im in her room). and i get paid like a motherfucker. fuck you. your lives suck. i am so fucking happy right now. a fag for posting here i know, but you guys just suck so bad i had to."

I'm not a singer. I don't know how to sing! But when I put my lips up. I can make ears ring. I'm so out of tune. I'm tone deaf! It doesn't matter. But the best is what's left.